You Own Nothing and They Think It's Funny

Are you radicalized yet?

With the advent of TikTok Shop and retailers like Temu and Shien, there is a plague of hyperconsumerism upon us, something that has been vocally frowned upon by… pretty much everyone. Fox News boomers and insufferable millennial environmentalists stand united on this one issue: stop buying mountains of plastic Chinese crap when your current possessions are perfectly fine.

And yet, on April 7, the biggest retailer in the world, Amazon, sent an email to customers who own Kindle devices released in 2012 or earlier. They told users who have been hanging on to perfectly good (and in many ways, superior to new models) ereader devices that starting May 20, those devices will no longer be able to purchase, borrow, or download new books. If a device needs a factory reset for any reason after that date, it’s bricked permanently. It cannot be re-registered.

The outrage was swift and justified. If you didn’t know, you can’t make ebook purchases on the Kindle app on your phone or tablet. Why? Because Amazon doesn’t want to give a cut to the Apple/Google store. That’s part of the appeal of the Kindle: buying books right from the device.

But now, that functionality will be taken away, even though the devices themselves still work. Perfectly.

One owner on X wrote that his Kindle Fire 7, a gift from his wife over a decade ago, was one of his most treasured possessions. “It wasn’t hurting anyone. It just sat there and worked every time I asked.” Most were less polite.

Amazon’s consolation prize for bricking god knows how many perfectly good devices for no damn reason was to offer a 20 percent discount on a new Kindle. As one customer pointed out, a discount on something you hadn’t wanted to buy in the first place is not exactly a good deal.